FIFA World Cup 2022 Unserious Starting XI: Players we expect more from in Qatar, including Walker Zimmerman


So we are done with the first round of matches and everybody will have their own rankings, but here is my spin on things. These are the 11 most unserious players from the first matchday of World Cup 2022. This is not to slander players, not to make fun but to highlight that we want you to do better in round two so we don’t see you here again. Really, this is for your own good.

So without further ado here are the players:

Goalkeeper

Edouard Mendy: Where has it gone wrong for the Senegalese keeper? Earlier in the year he was having a stormer of a season and now things are bad, both for club and country. He has been benched for Kepa Arrizabalaga who did not make the Spain squad and he was at fault for both of the goals the Dutch side scored against Senegal. Without Sadio Mane, Senegal need their stars to step up, with your goalkeeper behaving as unseriously as he did for the second goal, you better look for flights home, soon.

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Right back

Joao Cancelo: A sensational player for Manhester City, one of the best in the world in his role on his day, but his display against Ghana was shocking. Both of Ghana’s goals came down his side and he was having a torrid time. He is one of the players who Portugal relies on and he needs to figure out what is going on, fast.

Center back

Cristian Romero: That was a rough display from the Argentine defender against Saudi Arabia, so much so he was subbed off and 34-year-old Nicolas Otamendi stayed in the match. Romero is a very talented footballer who has been one of the players who does well for Tottenham when healthy, but he’s been struggling with injury this season. He needs to find the healthy version of his club form. If this continues, Buenos Aries will be getting their team back faster than they expected.

Walker Zimmerman: There were a few candidates who could have partnered Romero. And honestly the only region center back Niklas Sule isn’t here is that he was played out of position at right back. Zimmerman though. He’s a solid defender, does his job, brings his lunch pail and leaves. However, he should have never dove in against Gareth Bale. USA went from 3 points to 1 point, now they’re in a pickle when they face England. Walker, don’t dive in, thank you.

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Left back

Bryan Oviedo: This feels like bullying. You lose 7-0 against Spain, then get 8 minutes of extra time and now you’re in an article for being unserious. Sorry Bryan. He is a Costa Rican legend but that doesn’t save you from being unserious. Anyone from Costa Rica could have made this list but Bryan drew the short straw.

Center midfield

Danilo: I really do not understand why Fernando Santos insists on playing Danilo for Portugal, but he gets paid millions to coach and I do not. So maybe he knows something I don’t? I do know that Danilo was struggling against Ghana and was at fault for the first goal. For Danilo’s sake, play António Silva.

Leandro Paredes: This man’s a handsome fella, but he did not look against Saudi Arabia. They pressed and got physical, Leandro couldn’t handle it and eventually was hooked. A player with his skillset should’ve shown out, but now his country stares down the barrel of possible elimination against Mexico. 

Celso Borges: Again, I feel like a high school bully, but this has to be said. When you lose 7-0 and your midfield is dominated for a full 90, you have to take a look at the engine room and Celso was in there. He got hooked and subbed off, I, however, will not let you off the hook.

Right wing

Almoez Ali :The 26-year-old was named as one of the stars for the Qatar team. Well this star was totally eclipsed. There could have been more Qatar players but the lone shot attempt and loss (now two losses) adds Almoez Ali to the list.

Center forward

Kai Havertz: This feels like piling on but he was struggling against Japan. They pressed and pulled him out of shape. At this point, coaches know Kai Havertz is talented but finding a role for him is hard to come by and he is struggling, whether it is for club or country.

Left wing

Papu Gomez: Papu has had a hell of a career but man was he struggling against Saudi Arabia. If Argentina are to do anything in this tournament they need their wide players to stretch the pitch and give the other team hell, however these are things Papu did not do. He clogged the middle and Argentina paid for it.

Manager

Fernando Santos: Some of the players he started, the substitutions that he made, he was aggressively unserious and is very lucky that they won. Danilo starting over António Silva was a choice, Rafael Leao barely had time but he showed his talent, if Portugal are to do well at this World Cup, Fernando Santos needs to rejig and think about some of his decisions.



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